Having Been Adopted...

... and how I feel about it now, over 50 years later. Regardless of how I might have felt at the time, what I might have wanted or even what might have been better for me in the long run, my future appears to have been neatly arranged for me by complete strangers well before I was even born. Or was it?

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

My Natural Mother...

This is my natural mother, Nancee Lee Hopkins, two or three years before I was born...

Thursday, August 25, 2005

An Adoption Book List (updated on March 3rd 2010)

The English American
by Alison Larkin

The Girls Who Went Away
by Ann Fessler

The Baby Thief
by Barbara B. Raymond

Growing in the Dark ~ Adoption Secrecy and its Consequences
by Janine M. Baer

The Adoption Mystique: A Hard-Hitting Exposé of the Powerful Negative Social Stigma That Permeates Child Adoption in the United States
by Joanne Wolf Small

by Sarah Saffian

Not Remembered, Never Forgotten
by Robert Hafetz

Coming Apart Together
by Emily Hipchen

The Primal Wound
by Nancy Verrier

Coming Home to Self: The Adopted Child Grows Up
by Nancy Newton Verrier

Adoption Wisdom: A Guide to the Issues and Feelings of Adoption
by Marlou Russell, Ph.D.

Without A Map
by Meredith Hall

Because I Loved You: A Birthmother's View Of Open Adoption
by Patricia Dischler

Birth Fathers and Their Adoption Experiences
by Gary Clapton

Unlearning Adoption: A Guide to Family Preservation and Protection
by Jessica DelBalzo

Adoption: Uncharted Waters
by David Kirschner, Ph.D.

The Same Smile
by Susan Mello Souza with Joanne Medeiros Harrington

Lost & Found
by Betty Jean Lifton

Journey of the Adopted Self
by Betty Jean Lifton

The Adoption Triangle
by Arthur D. Sorosky, M.D., Annette Baran, M.S.W., Reuben Pannor, M.S.W.

Shedding Light On the Dark Side of Adoption
by Mirah Riben

The Stork Market
by Mirah Riben

Wake Up Little Susie
Rickie Solinger

Merry Bloch Jones

Shadow Mothers
Linda Back McKay

Synchronicity & Reunion
by LaVonne Harper Stiffler

Being Adopted: The Lifelong Search for Self
by David M. Brodzinsky, et al

Mother, Mother
by James Stingley

The Other Mother
by Carol Schaefer

Adoption Healing ~ a Path to Recovery
by Joe Soll, C.S.W.

Beneath a Tall Tree
by Jean Strauss

The Great Adoptee Search Book
by Jean A. Strauss

Birthright: The Guide to Search and Reunion for Adoptees, Birthparents, and Adoptive Parents
by Jean A. S. Strauss

The Stranger Who Bore Me: Adoptee-Birth Mother Relationships
by Karen Ruth March

So Here I Am! but Where Did I Come From?: An Adoptee's Search for Identity
by Mary Ruth Wotherspoon, Suzannah Tobin

Letters to My Birthmother: An Adoptee's Diary of Her Search for Her Identity
by Amy E. Dean

Broken Spirits ~ Lost Souls
by Jane Ryan

Faint Trails: A Guide to Adult Adoptee-Birth Parent Reunification Searches
by Hal Aigner

Missing Links: The True Story of an Adoptee's Search for His Birth Parents
by Vincent J. Begley

In Search of Mom: Journey of an Adoptee
by Michael C. Watson

Outer Search, Inner Journey: An Orphan and Adoptee's Quest
by Peter Dodds

Whose Child? : An Adoptee's Healing Journey from Relinquishment through Reunion ... and Beyond
by Kasey Hamner

Adoption Forum: Intimate Discussions to Unite the Triad in Healing
by Kasey Hamner

Tell Me No More Secrets, No More Lies: Life As an Adoptee
by Ginni D. Snodgrass

Search: A Handbook for Adoptees and Birthparents
by Jayne Askin

Adoption Reunion Survival Guide: Preparing Yourself for the Search, Reunion, and Beyond
by Julie Jarrell Bailey, Lynn N., M.A. Giddens

A Man and His Mother: An Adopted Son's Search
by Tim Green

Through the Eyes of an Adoptee: One Man's Compelling Search for His Beginnings
by Frank Law

Received in Grace: The Search for a Birth Family
by Norman M. Carson

The Search of a Lifetime
by Kathryn M. Denton, Teresa M. Cummings

Lifeline: The Action Guide to Adoption Search
by Virgil L. Klunder, et al

The Search for Anna Fisher
by Florence Fisher

Motherless Daughters
by Hope Edelman

The Ultimate Search Book: Worldwide Adoption & Vital Records
by Lori Carangelo

Sacred Connections - Stories of Adoption
Essays by Mary Ann Koenig
Photographs by Niki Berg
(Beautiful coffee-table type of book with lots of touching stories)

Follow Your Heart (fiction)
by Lori Paris

Evil Exchange (fiction)
by Lori Paris and Joe Soll

A Spell is Cast (fiction)
by Eleanor Cameron

Ballet Shoes (fiction)
by Noel Streatfeild

Understood Betsy (fiction)
by Dorothy Canfield

Anne of Green Gables (fiction)
by L.M. Montgomery


Tuesday, August 16, 2005

An explanation of what's to come ~

I have mixed opinions… as well as mixed emotions… about adoption.

What follows will contain vents and rants - as well as raves - about what I think and how I feel about adoption in general and specifically how I feel about having been adopted myself… when I was four days old, I was taken from the Temple Hospital nursery in Los Angeles by people who were, until that day, total strangers to me.

Also following will be what I think, what I know and what I thought I knew - and the truths, the untruths and everything in-between.

It will be about families and about how I feel about mine - all of them - how strangers became my family and my family became the strangers - and then all were reunited to become a family once again.

It will be about my mom and my dad, who were the only parents I ever knew.

It will be about Nancee, my natural mother, whom I never even met... and how I feel about being what I now know was her L.A. secret.

It will be about what I still want and need to find out and the different paths I've taken in order to unravel and make sense of a very complicated and tragic past.

This is a journey that never seems to end.